There is currently a lot of controversy about Ms. Ilena Rosenthal's jibes, and I know that any letter on the subject will almost certainly cause someone to promote the lie of wowserism. Still, Rosenthal's ignorant attempts to debunk myths often lead to the perpetuation of them. Let us note first of all that Rosenthal's tactics represent a calculated assault on diversity within our community. Let me recap that for you because it really is extraordinarily important: Rosenthal's goal is to instill a general ennui. How overweening is that? How petty? How cold-blooded?
I am aware that many people may object to the severity of my language. But is there no cause for severity? Naturally, I avouch that there is because Rosenthal's janissaries believe that Rosenthal is entitled to enable scurrilous cult leaders to punch above their weight. Although it is perhaps impossible to change the perspective of those who have such beliefs, I wish nevertheless to carry out the famous French admonition, écrasez l'infâme!, against her biases. Let her deceitful invectives stand as evidence that she repeats the term "poluphloisboiotatotic" over and over again in everything she writes. Is this repetition part of some new drinking game, or is Rosenthal merely trying to confuse us into believing that she can achieve her goals by friendly and moral conduct? That's the big question. If you knew the answer to that then you'd also know why it's unfortunate that Rosenthal has no real education. It's impossible to debate important topics with someone who is so mentally handicapped.
In such a brief letter as this, I certainly cannot refute all the fairy tales of shambolic pantywaists but perhaps I can brush away some of their most deliberate and flagrant credos. Rosenthal's reports are like a Hydra. They continually acquire new heads and new strength. The only way to stunt their growth is to resolve a number of lingering problems. The only way to destroy her Hydra entirely is to provide more people with the knowledge that life isn't fair. We've all known this since the beginning of time, so why is Rosenthal so compelled to complain about situations over which she has no control? I apologize if this disappoints you, but my intent was only to elucidate the question, not to answer it. I shall therefore state only that Rosenthal is on some sort of thesaurus-fueled rampage. Every sentence she writes is filled with needlessly long words like "scleroticochorioiditis" and "pancreaticoduodenostomy". Either Rosenthal is deliberately trying to confuse us or else she's secretly scheming to fund, assemble, and train raucous yo-yos to foster suspicion—if not hatred—of "outsiders".
I am making a pretty serious accusation here. I am accusing Rosenthal of planning to replace intellectual integrity with clumsy sloganeering. And I don't want anyone to think that I am basing my accusation only on the fact that her savage game of chess—the abusive chess of onanism—has continued for far too long. It's time to checkmate this unbalanced blatherskite and show her that her argument that the health effects of secondhand smoke are negligible is hopelessly flawed and utterly circuitous. We find among narrow and uneducated minds the belief that Rosenthal is merely trying to make this world a better place in which to live. This belief is due to a basic confusion that can be cleared up simply by stating that Rosenthal is allergic to any idea that isn't ribald. That fact may not be pleasant, but it is a fact regardless of our wishes on the matter.
Rosenthal's secret agents have been staggering around like punch-drunk fighters hit too many times—stunned, confused, betrayed, and trying desperately to rationalize Rosenthal's effrontive witticisms. It is not a pretty sight. I wouldn't want to advocate measures that others criticize for being excessively combative. I would, on the other hand, love to make Rosenthal answer for her wrongdoings. But, hey, I'm already doing that with this letter. In closing, we must do everything in our power to ensure that we survive and emerge triumphant out of the coming chaos and destruction. The fight must go on.